Water Soluble Oil on Canvas
26” × 33”
In prison, stripped of the ability to have real romantic relationships, I was left with time—time to reflect on the relationships I had before. What surfaced was uncomfortable but necessary. I realized I had carried distorted expectations into love. I had seen my partners as idols—symbols of purity, faith, and salvation. I wanted them to fix me, to fulfill me, to reflect something divine. But that wasn’t fair. It wasn’t real. I overlooked their humanity, their flaws, their desires that existed independent of mine.
Idol is about moving beyond that illusion. In this painting, I try to see the person not as a reflection of my needs, but as someone with their own interior world—sensual, autonomous, and full. This work is a turning point in my effort to stop using others as mirrors and begin recognizing them as whole, real people. It’s part of the long work of becoming someone who loves without possession.
** Please note: All canvas works are unstretched and without frame. Images are here so you can get an idea of painting size and possible ways to display in your home.
Water Soluble Oil on Canvas
26” × 33”
In prison, stripped of the ability to have real romantic relationships, I was left with time—time to reflect on the relationships I had before. What surfaced was uncomfortable but necessary. I realized I had carried distorted expectations into love. I had seen my partners as idols—symbols of purity, faith, and salvation. I wanted them to fix me, to fulfill me, to reflect something divine. But that wasn’t fair. It wasn’t real. I overlooked their humanity, their flaws, their desires that existed independent of mine.
Idol is about moving beyond that illusion. In this painting, I try to see the person not as a reflection of my needs, but as someone with their own interior world—sensual, autonomous, and full. This work is a turning point in my effort to stop using others as mirrors and begin recognizing them as whole, real people. It’s part of the long work of becoming someone who loves without possession.
** Please note: All canvas works are unstretched and without frame. Images are here so you can get an idea of painting size and possible ways to display in your home.